A Love/Hate Relationship

Since I am using my blog as a means to document this new chapter of our lives, I feel it only necessary to discuss the one thing that sums up my life right now.

Oh the joys of morning sickness...

Morning sickness and I have a love/hate relationship.

I love that I am sick since that is something I prayed I would be able to experience. I hate that the "sick" feeling lasts all day long.

I love that I work at home so that I can "get sick" in the privacy of my own home. I hate that when I drive my car these days, I have to carry a bag with me for those moments I can't pull over.

I love knowing that the Little Youngster is healthy but am looking forward to the day where I can keep food down for more than 5 minutes.

This week I start my 11Th week. I am praying that there will be light at the end of the tunnel soon. Yet at the same time, I am thankful that I am finally able to experience the joys of pregnancy. Even if it means the porcelain throne is my home away from home.

Many of my friends have given me some great tips on things that helped them. I have tried them all but none seem to work as well as what I found last night.

I found a box of these cookies at my in law's house and helped myself to a few. They are delicious and do the trick. Of course, I should have known that the Youngster would love cookies. Baby's Daddy is a huge fan of sweet treats too!

And on a bit of a side note, I want to say something to those of you who wish you could experience morning sickness but haven't had a chance. I still have many friends in my life who are praying for a baby. I always hated when people would complain about their pregnancy woes because I would think "Really? You are going to complain when you have all that you have ever wanted, a baby." I would have given nothing to be in their shoes. In fact, I wouldn't trade this part of my journey with anyone because it just means that God has heard my cried and blessed us. I am truly thankful for this opportunity but for the sake of documenting my journey, keep it real as well.

Yesterday in church we sang one of my all time favorite songs, I Stand In Awe of You. Needless to say, I cried like a baby as I thought about all the ways I stand in awe of God in this season of my life. There have been many prayers answered in all areas of my life and I can only give God the glory. I hope that as I continue to document our baby journey, even the not so fun parts, that you will hang with me. My goal is to give God the glory every step of the way yet keep it real for my own memory sake.

And one last thing about morning sickness.

I love that I have lost 10 pounds since I have been pregnant, courtesy of my trips to the porcelain throne.

The Day We Found Out...

On the day we found out, Jeff started singing our new theme song. I laugh out loud every time I think of him laying in bed singing, "One day at a time...SWEET JESUS!" And let's face it, I am little in awe that he knew the words to this little ditty. Can we say old school?



He then was watching his "girlfriend's" Christmas special when she sang one of my favorite Christmas songs. As this song was being sung, he kept saying, "So true, so true! mmm, mmm, sing it Faith."

The song? Well, watch the video by clicking here

I swear this man keeps me rolling! I couldn't be more thankful to be able to walk this journey with him. He keeps me laughing--that's for sure.

And for those of you wanting a "belly shot", here I am at 7 weeks. In this picture, I refer to the belly bump as my Clomid bump since it has been super hard to lose that little added fluff that was added two years ago. Oh well, it was all part of the process that led me here today. Even though for me, Clomid was a big waste of time and did nothing to aid. (sorry I will stop before I get on a soapbox) I still can't believe that God finally opened my womb even when doctors said it wouldn't happen without medical intervention. Still amazes me...oh right, no soapbox, here's the picture.




To God be the glory, great things He hath done

The Post That I Have Been Praying to Get to Write

Sunday, December 13Th God answered a huge prayer for Jeff and I. After 4 Years of trying for a child, I finally got my positive plus sign. Sit back, relax and enjoy reading the post I have been praying I would be able to write for many years.

Not sure where to begin because how can I possibly put into word's all that God has done in our lives over the past few weeks. I guess I should start with the week before Thanksgiving. My grandmother was very ill and we thought she was going to die at any moment. I am happy to report that she is still with us and doing much better. The night after I spent the day at the hospital, I went home and pleaded with God to allow me the chance to tell her I was pregnant one day. This thought went with me everywhere. I wanted desperately to share with her the news that God had finally answered our prayers. I remember at one point, bowing on my knees and telling God that I would be happy with whatever the outcome because I knew He was fully in control. I knew from that point forward whatever happened God was sovereign and that He would give me peace to walk whatever road He has laid out for me.

Fast forward to December 7Th and still nothing (if you know what I mean) I was officially 2 days late at this point. Yet I was trying to put it completely out of my mind and soak up the holiday season. December 12Th comes around and I am officially over a week late. That Saturday night, I decided to let Jeff know what was going on. He had been my biggest support of the last four years so I didn't want anyone to know but him. We decided that Sunday would be the big day to take the test. That night we were talking about the what ifs and at one point Jeff said, "If you are pregnant it will be an absolute miracle." And I responded back saying, "If I am not pregnant then there is something terribly wrong with my body because I have never been more than 3 days late." I went to bed that night praying for God to give me peace with whatever the outcome.

4:30 a.m December 13Th--I woke up from a deep sleep and felt the Lord was calling me to take a test. Somehow at that point I knew I was about to get the best Christmas present ever. I did what I needed to do and took the test out into the living room to wait for the results by the glow of the Christmas tree.

PREGNANT!

I knelled on the floor next to our tree, covered my mouth and said a silent prayer of thanks to God for finally giving me a positive plus sign. Here is a picture of my journal entry from that day.

An hour later, I went in and woke a sleeping Jeff with the wonderful news. I still laugh remembering the state of shock he walked around in the rest of that day.

The thing that most of my family and friends have been surprised that I actually waited to share the news. There was many times that I wanted to call everyone I knew to tell them right away but I really wanted the memory of sharing with our families on Christmas Day. And can you blame me? I think after four years of negatives and tears I should be allowed this bit of joy.

But there was one person I rushed to tell, my grandmother.

One of the greatest joys so far is seeing her face when I told her the news. At first she thought I was lying. I swore to her that this time, it's for real and then she started to cry. I cried because I still couldn't believe that God would allow me this chance to share this news with her. She said, "I thought God stopped listening to me years ago but now I see that He has not."

To God be the glory!

I promise to start blogging again and share our journey with you.

Thank you to all of you who have been faithful prayer warriors for us. We have been blessed with friends like you who stick by us through thick and thin.

More of the story coming soon so stay tuned.