Here's why.
Imagine my disappointment when I came up not pregnant the night of our anniversary.
I hesitate to mention this because I don't want it to sound like once again I am complaining about not having a baby. I am in a good place and here is why.
I knew that if something didn't happen this month, I would go to the doctor.
I called in on Monday to get an appointment. Before I even dialed the phone, I prayed for God to show me if this was the direction that He wanted for us to go down. I waited while the nurse checked the calendar. She had something for Tuesday at 10:10 in the morning. Click here to read why 10:10 is a significant time for me.
So I head into the doctor on Tuesday. I was a little nervous and came very close to calling my mom to go to the doctor with me. But I figure since I am 30 I should act like an adult and go by myself. On the drive over, my all time favorite song, Walk By Faith by Jeremy Camp was playing on the radio. By the time I got to the doctor I was fully at peace.
The doctor did the usual stuff but the whole time she kept telling me, "The timing is perfect for you to come in today. It couldn't get more better than this." And I am thinking to myself, "Praise you Lord, Praise YOU!"
You see most of the tests that she has to run had to happen this week or I would have to wait another full month for the tests. That day, the day of the appointment was the last day I could do one of the tests. Praise God for His timing! I got it done and was able to schedule all the rest for the rest of the week.
Today I had another test to see if the inner workings were opened properly. I am happy to report that they are doing just fine.
Now my reasoning for sharing with you all is simple, I want to glorify God. Jeff and I are taking life one day at a time and are trying our best to enjoy the journey. I believe joy is a choice. I believe you can choose to be sad and bitter for what God is not doing or you can look at what He is doing and give Him a standing ovation. I believe that walking by faith also means that we have to die to our wills and trust God to work it all out for His glory.
I refuse to let Satan get the best of me. I refuse to bottle myself up and not tell people all that God is doing even when the big requests aren't happening. I believe that there is a reason for everything and God will use every facet of our lives to get our focus to Him.
For me this waiting period is proving to me, time and time again that I am not in control. I am using this time to draw near to God, to rest in His plan for my life. Even if His plan does not include children. I simply have to wait with total confidence that the Lord will answer all my requests in due time. And by golly, I am going to enjoy this journey. I will not hide out and be sad, mad or angry because it's not happening to me. I will rejoice with others and I will be happy, content, at peace and have full satisfaction with wherever God may lead us.
Friends, if you too are waiting-don't let Satan get the best of you!
Trust God to show you the way because His timing is perfect!!!
"He has made everything beautiful in It's time!"
Ecclesiastes 3:11
9 comments:
Sweet cousin! God is good. THank you for sharing and not allowing Satan to live in that area of your life. Love you!
i remember something a sweet Mom who had 2 beautiful kids then had several miscarriages in a row told her hubbie. She came in to tell him she was having another miscarriage and said - "Satan's not going to get ANY glory from me this time. God's getting ALL of it". I think our responses to life and to the path the Lord leads us down offers us a choice every time: to give the Lord glory, or to give it to the evil one. You are making the better choice, my dear one. love you
Thank you for your write up. It is really true that we can decide how best to react when things do not work out they exact way we planned.
I am anonymous who sent you a birthday greeting all the way from Nigeria, Africa.My name is Gayle. I had two miscarriages before I had my two beautiful daughters. In the midst of al the pain, my husband and I choose to trust God and knew that He was with us. I love the way you are dealing with this. I promise to pray for you and your husband and pray that this journey brings you nearer to him.
God bless you.
In Him,
Gayle(gayleola@yahoo.com)
I am glad to hear your approach to your trials. God is good and will take care of us in His time. I am glad you are choosing to enjoy your ride. Have a great weekend.
Amen, sister! Thanks for being an inspiration to blogland!
I love you my sweet friend... ~ kim
Thank you Susan. Thank you again. I needed that post. You are always so wise and insightful, even in the midst of trials. After reading your words, I realize I have been pounding my head against a brick wall persistant that my will was the best way. What is happening in our lives right now may not be what I wanted, but as soon as I give that up I can see clearly the abundant blessings he is giving us - just in a different direction. I have copied some of your words and posted them on my computer to remind me, until I am fully able to accept and rejoice in our new path. (I promise to correctly cite the source!) :) I continue to pray for you and once again - thank you.
You are so awesome.
And God is amazing!
I am just so blessed to read your words today Susan. I haven't been by in a week and this just makes me smile and rejoice. You keep believing God! I know you will get the desires of your heart.
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